well here i am again..

i dunno why im back here.. plain weird but i guess i want to type. a lot.

first of all, i used to have this class mate. first time i met her, i knew, she was a one piece hardcore of a b***h. i told my bff, i don like her. yeah, i may sound childish but seriously, it was a major case of Hate-at-first-sight.

she sat with Julie & her gang, that was in 2008. she was that loud asshole who thinks the world revolves around her (she doesnt realise that ppl hate her though) & always make it seem like she’s the nice girl next door.

now, i noe im a quiet person. i don talk much but i listen. & i see. i’ve seen stuff about this classmate which made her even much more disgusting to me. trust me, all of these, it is PERSONAL experience. not from other ppl. just me, directly from me.

i do noe for one thing though, when i spent time with her, i start cursing & cussing a whole darn lot. is it the influence? or was i just meaning every thing towards her?

now, call me weird, but ppl think that im best friends forever with her when, the truth: she’s the most hated person in my phone book. i hate her more than i hate my brother. imagine that.

i don remember this one thing, she started hangin out with me & Mas just after the 2008 June holidays. i noticed 1 thing, & i wasnt the only one. it led to Faiz (Mas’s longtime on-&-off date) comin up with this particular theory, how me & Mas started doing badly for our papers etc. u get where im going??

well, we got retained the end of the year.. get my gist??

a huge part of me blamed my carelessness of course, but e small remaining part puts the blame on my environment. see e road im going??

anyways, i typed a whole lot of my feelings on FB.. & her family don seem to be taking it well. well, it was meant for her, not her family. theres nothing i can do rite if they don like it??

& in retaliation to wad she wrote on her blog, i guess thats why im writing this. i do not regret writing all of those on FB. let everyone read them for all i care. she deserves it for the sufferings i went through while she was around. she’s not neccessarily a gd fren, now come to think of it, i never was myself.

ive always believed in “What goes around, Comes around”. she had it coming. after all, if she never did took any of those actions she took, these things wouldnt have happened & i wouldnt be dissing her like this. i noe, its harsh, but she thinks she’s a strong girl. she’ll THINK she’ll be able to get thru this one. (since she got thru a lot of stuff already it seemed) (or at least that’s wad she said)

i bet she doesnt remember the stuff that she did to me, but ive paid them back in full price. i might get IT back at me but for the time being, i don really care. thats it then for the weekened. all my anger done up in the beautiful world of Facebook.. 🙂

ps: ouh btw in ur blog, u hoped that im happy after doin this to u. well yea, ur hopes werent dashed. i AM MUCH happier now. so thank u.

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Happy Ma Day

Happy Mothers’ Day to all the beautiful mothers out there in the wide wide world…

bought me mam a piece of cheesecake.. nuthin special but it’s sumthing that i thought would make her happy for a while… 🙂 luv yer mam. !!

saw Frankie just after work.. was in the bus & i turned & saw him walking down the steps of E Hub’s entrance.. shock of the day.. never did expect to see him anywhere around during the weekends.. heck

worst part was seeing him while i heard Untukmu on my phone.. the lyrics + him in front of my eyes = awkward…

for reasons i cant be bothered to type down.. i’ll just shuddup..

k bye..

crazee

ok.. weird weird week…
guess wad, ive been listening to malay songs all week… & me sis said it’s a good technique to improve on my malay… well, she’s got a point… me listening to English songs i speak in English most of the time.. now that ive been listening to malay songs again, im speaking malay even on Twitter.. 🙂

pretty hot & humid week.. i feel sick to my tummy.. it’s HOT HOT HOT…

institute day tmr… feeling cranky bout it.. don wanna go but gotta go cuz there’s sum award achievement thingy i gotta take…

was supposed to go to the soccer match couple of days back.. didnt go though.. gave e reason that ive gotta go tuition.. there’s ‘nother reason though.. sumthin much more impt..

should i put it up here??
i don wanna be there.. even if she’s not playing.. it’s not becuz im jealous or anythin but……. im happy when he’s happy… but i cant be there.. get wad i mean?? forget it… im just not ready i guess>???

wad else to talk about..?? math is killing me but im loving it.. get wad i mean when i say im weirder now…

going to work on my math homework later on.. there’s still PW stuff to complete..

wad a boring Friday.. imagine me saying im bored on a Friday nite.. OMG

#nowplaying Gerenti Beres – KRU

🙂 🙂 🙂

crappin’ out..

AWEsome AWEsome Day

nice day, nice day…

good weather turnbad…

sneezed me whole day thru.. me nose hurts & it feels like comin out… & blood came out from my mouth & it has got nuthin to do with me teeth…

Treasurer work is hard work… collecting money from a grp of ppl u hardly get to meet, u don recognize is tough…

AWEsome AWEsome… im just lovin it….

tryna figure out how im gonna start on my PI… already started draftin.. love for sports.. 😉

i shud prolly get back to PI.. & ive still yet to pack for tmr’s game..

3rd position, here we come..

listenin’ to Body Language by J-Mac feat. T-Pain
it’s a Body, Body, Body Language.. it’s a Body, Body, Body Language..
hey hey hey hey…

crappin out 😉

in school….

in the O Hub rite now… thinking wad me should be doin…

i feel so depressed.. for i dunno wad reasons… i just feel so god-damn sad….

weirdly enough, its not about the match we’re gonna be part of this evening..

everytime i see u i feel happy. but as days get by, everytime i see u i feel sad. it’s just not the same now that it’s best for me to stay away, not that i’ve always been near.. but i suppose, it’s time to move on don yer think? time to get a grip on myself & get a move on now that u’ve found sumone to be happy with…

as long as ur happy, i think i can always be happy..

yea, it may sound so idealistic but hey, that’s wad im really feelin now o.k….

sigh sigh sigh..

i noe when im not good enough.. i never will be good enough for anybody.. no guy ever would ever dream of being with me.. i’m not pretty, i’m not voluptous.. all i have is just layers of fat & a crazy personality…

thanks to u though, i’m even quieter now, not gonna be able to face anybody..

it’s ok, i’ll just bring my downer self away from u.. & perhaps, just play my anger away during the game later…

Key To My Life

Everyday I Love You

MI vs RJC

painful fight, definitely….

i’ve got an aching spine which i dunno wad to do with…

anyways, it was a defo tough fight, MI was fighting to the deaths & RJ was a bloody murderer.. Vice Cap got hurt halfway thru first half cuz of gastric pain i think, so lesson learnt: eat breakfast before an ordeal.. but i couldnt myself, wasnt a nervous wreck like Basirah was but i just couldnt eat, noe wad i mean??

gut instincts were a blast for the past week.. felt numb on Friday, i cant feel anything, nervous or scared or anything… even when we went into the pitch area for basics bfore the match, i still was NUMB… 3 pm sharp before the match start, LIGHTNING RISK alert… match postponed till today, Saturday… then i felt a funny feelin this morning… Fahar was all feelin nervous & stuff, she felt like sumthing unexpected was going to happen but i dismissed her, saying i have a feelin we were gonna win this match at least by 1 goal & WE DID!!! 🙂

we fought like mad & it paid off.. trainings under the rain during the 1 week hols had been a cold one but that sure give us gd results init?? so’s im gonna do the same for studies… prepare myself ages before the war starts…

Thursday was a happy happy day…!!! Fri was kinda tiring, & when i get tired it’s either i shuddup or talk nonsense…

‘nother match this Monday.. so i’m gonna start on my E-Learning stuff…

‘prolly wanna play on EGO for a while but i need my sleep.. working the morning shift tmr…

ME LOVE FRANKIE!! nitez 🙂

a brand new term

new term, new months to come…

seriously, i can’t wait for the end of the year to come, i’m starting to feel the tireness of life, n heck i’m getting old…

met my aunt a couple of days ago, asked if i’ve a boyfriend.. i was like, “Huh, boyfriend? Sapelah nak ngan Nadia, Mama Ani?”

n she was like, u noe how aunties can get when they talk about this kind of issues.. i mean, puh-leeze, i’m only 19, why the heck should i have a boyfriend?? a lil’ bit too much time don’t yer think if i’ve one??

sometimes though, i’d imagine life, how’d it be like if i’ve a boyfriend.. i’ve a lot of friends who are in relationships, even more who are not… then u get ppl comparing boyfriends bla bla bla… it’s not like i give a shit but there are just times when ppl look at u like, “Hey, I’ve a boyfriend, do u?”… u noe that sort of thing, it’s crazy really n i don care but sometimes, just sometimes….

it’d be really nice to noe that i DO have someone who’d at the very least admire me from far or something like that.. i’m not pretty, i’m fat & dark, n have a very humid sense of humor… i look fierce all the time, ppl don bat an eye when i walk past… i’m clumsy, lame, n not necessarily that intelligent.. i mean, i can’t even pass off as a dork..

why r we talking bout this again??

anyways, the girls’ hockey team got thru to Top 6, n will be soon fighting for the 4th position.. i’d be really lovely to be able to go that far as a team.. i’d say this is the best Hockey team i’ve been on, n i’d definitely miss the core playars of the team nex yr.. Pet, Fatin, Farha, Wani, Dayah would have graduated by then.. n then Hui Ting wont be able to play cuz she’ll be 21..

talkin’ bout 21, Frankie won’t be able to play for the school’s rugby team nex year either…

i’ve still a long way to go… 19 feels like 91 sometimes….

If I’m not the one

I’m starin at your picture every night
The scent of you still lingers in my mind
I wonder if your alone and feel alright
And the sun has come out of the clouds

And sometimes when I listen to our song
The night seems so cold and far too long
I wanna call you up cuz in the end
I keep writing letters to my garbage can

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